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2005 Top 10

The Year's Best Films


1. Yes
2. Brokeback Mountain
3. Saraband
4. Syriana
5. Good Night, and Good Luck.
6. Asylum
7. Ballets Russes
8. Nobody Knows
9. Caché
10. Mysterious Skin

Runners-up: 2046, The Aristocrats, Batman Begins, The Constant Gardener, Downfall, Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room, A History of Violence, Kung Fu Hustle, Gus Van Sant's Last Days, Oldboy, The New World, The Producers, Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith, Turtles Can Fly, Wallace & Gromit: The Curse of the Were-Rabbit.

The Year's Worst Films (There But For the Grace of God Go You): Alone In the Dark, White Noise, Supercross, Doom, Harry and Max, The Amityville Horror, Lila Says, King's Ransom, The Pacifier, Yours, Mine & Ours.

Overrated/Overhyped: Match Point, Junebug, Me and You and Everyone We Know, March of the Penguins, Hustle & Flow.

Underrated/Undersold/Overlooked: Yes, Asylum, Ballets Russes, The Producers, Forty Shades of Blue.

The Yellow-Bellied Coward Award goes to the studios that released Aeon Flux, In the Mix, The Fog, Cry_Wolf, King's Ransom, Cursed, Man of the House, Boogeyman, et al (the 2005 films not screened for critics).

Coolest Titles: Lipstick & Dynamite, Piss & Vinegar: The First Ladies of Wrestling, The Year of Yao, Man with the Screaming Brain, The Devil's Rejects.

Worst Titles: Dreamer: Inspired by a True Story, Ice Princess, Miss Congeniality 2: Armed and Fabulous, Monster-in-Law, The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lava Girl in 3-D, Herbie: Fully Loaded.

Best and Worst Title: XXX: State of the Union.

Aptest Titles: Eternal, White Noise, Doom, Alone In the Dark, Mindhunters, Stealth, Waiting..., Are We There Yet?.

Inaptest Title: Be Cool, The Talent Given Us, Just Like Heaven, Rebound, Fun with Dick and Jane.

Movies That Never Got Anywhere Near Me (whew!): Gory Gory Hallelujah, A Tale of Two Pizzas, All Babes Want to Kill Me, Slutty Summer, Mobsters and Mormons.

Demented Double Features/Marathon Madness:

 

  • Breakfast on Pluto/Transamerica (gender benders)
  • Cheaper by the Dozen 2/Yours, Mine & Ours (best arguments for birth control)
  • Kicking and Screaming/Green Street Hooligans (GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOALL!)
  • Head-On/Wedding Crashers (nuptial bliss-ters)
  • Good Night, and Good Luck./The Aristocrats (censor this!)
  • Grizzly Man/Duma/King Kong/The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe ("Maybe we shouldn't be hanging out with savage beasts...Naaah!")
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