A brain-rotting live-action cartoon that's more ghastly than funny, the Adam Sandler-Kevin James buddy picture I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry is casually sexist, racist, and homophobic in a way obviously intended to pander to a school-age audience of kids that don't yet know any better. Ironically, the movie is something of a Sandler apologia for past homophobic gags, with cameos by Richard Chamberlain and Lance Bass supposedly legitimizing it (The Gay & Lesbian Alliance against Defamation decried the "stereotypes and anti-gay slurs" while endorsing "the overall message...of family and acceptance.")
Chuck (Sandler) and Larry (James) are NYFD firefighters who pretend to be in a domestic partnership to protect widower-dad Larry's benefits. Chuck's initial reaction? "Domestic partnership. You mean like faggots?" Big laugh from the audience here, but if they choked on it later, I didn't hear it. To raise the stakes, screenwriters Barry Fanaro and Alexander Payne & Jim Taylor (yep, the Oscar-nominated team behind Sideways) give Larry a young daughter (Shelby Adamowsky) and son (Cole Morgen) to worry about (though the script daintily dances around briefing the kids about the lie). For good measure, the son is a tap-dancing lover of musical theatre: you know what that means!
In the overcompensation department, Chuck is established as a raging lothario. After insulting a female doctor with sexist come-ons, Chuck has an orgy with the suddenly bubbly blonde and five Hooters girls. Soon, when they learn the consequences if their fraud is discovered, Chuck and Larry hire an unreasonably hot lawyer (Jessica Biel). The plot turn allows for a tense romance, as gal pal and guy pal discover their feelings run deeper than wanting to shop together. Because Chuck and Larry now live a lie and experience the homophobia of gay protestors and firehouse colleagues, they learn empathy.
Because it's a Sandler movie, I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry is unrealistic as a matter of course (while saving a morbidly obese man from a terrifying fire, Chuck stands around wisecracking) and filled to bursting with comedic support and cameos. There's the fire chief (Dan Aykroyd); the intimidating, muscle-bound gay firefighter (Ving Rhames); the sniveling, suspicious government investigator (Steve Buscemi); the mincing clothes-store salesman (Dave Matthews); the nasty anti-gay protestor (Rob Corrdry); and the slanty-eyed, buck-toothed Asian preacher (Rob Schneider). I sure hope Sandler's next movie is about learning the pain of Asian folks...that'd be hilarious!
Though it hammers home a pro-gay, anti-homophobia message before it's through, the movie's supposed entertainment value is based entirely on Sandler's drooling over Biel's juicy behind and bazoombas, his gay panic, and a collection of swishy stereotypes. Excepting James' mannish maid, there's not a woman in the movie that isn't objectified; likewise, there's not a gay man who isn't creepy, scary, or flaming. The filmmakers wrongly figure their hypocrisy will be forgiven and forgotten by the climactic championship of gay rights, as heroically affirmed by two straight idiots.